Surprised by how good I'm feeling on recent runs. Aches are minor, legs feel fresh, effort comfortable. I've also been pleasantly surprised by the consistency of my runs while traveling. Often times when I travel getting out the door in the morning to run is a challenge. I'm a person of habits and traveling throws a wrench into my morning routine. But this trip to Columbus, Geneva and now Seaside I've gotten out the door more days than not and the days I didn't run were due to foot pain and a morning flight. It feels good to be running relatively pain free after these years of enduring it. I look forward to the morning run and more times than not recently I've been rewarded with a pleasurable one.
In addition, running without pain allows the mind to wander. On this morning's run I got thinking about mom and her influence on me and the rest of the family. Below are some reflections on that.
Quiet Strength
When I was growing up I looked up to my dad. He was my first baseball coach, later my high school track coach. He was a leader in the church and community. He was on church committees, library board, president of the Lions Club and I'm sure involved in other things that I'm not aware.
When I was in middle school he went back to college to become a teacher, changing careers in his 30s. He took night classes while helping raise three kids and working full time.
As a teacher and middle school basketball coach he touched the lives of hundreds of kids. The significance of this was on display at his viewing when he lost his fight with cancer.
I had always seen him as the strength of our family. He was a superb role model who demonstrated kindness and giving back to the community. I'm please when see his traits in me.
After he died I came to recognize the quiet strength of my mom throughout my life. Mom was always present, often times working side by side with Dad. She attended our games and meets, made sure we were nourished and no doubt did too much for us when it came to laundry, cooking and cleaning.
My parents were the perfect couple. I don't recall them arguing in front of us. They provided us with a solid foundation of love, discipline, trust and support. Even though mom played the role of being the person who checked in with us on the challenges of navigating middle school and high school, it was my dad that I viewed as the strength of the family.
My first indication of her importance to my dad and our family was when dad called to tell me she was in the hospital with an aneurysm. I heard the fear in my dad's voice as he tried not to cry describing her condition. I realized just how connected they were to each other and for the first time saw the vulnerability of my parents. Mom recovered, but dad had started showing a constant cough and losing weight. Cancer was invading his lungs.
I learned what wailing sounded like when he died about a year later. Mom was devoted in the care she gave him. Being at his side through chemo treatments and the agonizing aftermath. I was able to come home a couple of times that year and see the love and compassion she had while caring for him. I was fortunate to be home his last week. When he finally passed all the emotions, pressure, fear, love and more was released by my mom. All I could do was wrap my arms around her as she had done to me on so many occasions.
That was more than 20 years ago. Since then mom has continued to thrive and continue to nurture and be involved in the community. She has become the matriarch of the family and of Geneva. The "go to" person when someone has a question about Geneva's past. She has been a prime caregiver for my sister who has MS and needs daily assistance. She walks and rides her bike for exercise and errands. She goes to water aerobics even though she's had a long time fear of water.
These past 20 some years have shown me that mom was the quiet strength of the family. Always there, supporting us and dad in whatever we were doing. She has shown that one can continue to grow as a person after losing a partner and sole mate. She has taken on the role of offering advice, criticism, support and always love. She has confided her fears and doubts to me, but that only makes her seem stronger, she has the ability to share those, something I hope to learn. I'm pleased when I see her traits in me.
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